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Online relationships
#1
What are your opinions about them?

Can they work out? 

Do you consider them real relationships even if the two people involved never meet irl?

Ever had one of your own?



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#2
I would consider them real, especially with the use if video chat/Facetime and other things that make a person "there". There are a couple of people I know or have known that have had long distance online relationships and it worked out great. They have also eventually met IRL with their significant other.

For me, well, I have never had a relationship to begin with so that is a solid "no."
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#3
(2019-04-04 00:55:17)David Wrote:
(2019-04-04 00:13:30)Uptight 534 Wrote: For me, well, I have never had a relationship to begin with so that is a solid "no."

Same here brother, but being single is great

Oh yeah, man. I have no qualms about it.
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#4
I dated a few people online. One of them was a member in JV, but who that was is a secret Wink

I dated someone else unrelated to this place long enough to be considered to be a working relationship, but given that we're so far away I had to just admit that it wasn't gonna work. Now we're best friends though!

Growing up, the whole idea behind this was starting to get silly.
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#5
[stream of bullshit consciousness below]

EDIT: This sounds a lot more depressing now that I've read it today lol.
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#6
well I'm sure we're all familiar

I've had a handful of online relationships, and it's true that since I've grown up and experienced "real" or real-life relationships I no longer understand how online relationships can really work. By all means, I understand how two people can develop a connection online and grow affection for one another, but without the reality of being with them in person, witnessing and knowing their quirks, habits and the people they surround themselves with, I don't feel you can get the full picture. But that's my opinion on relationships that are exclusively online with no feasible or concrete plans to meet each other in the near future. I do still believe that online relationships can be successful, and I've heard of many that have been despite circumstances that I would consider super unlikely to work out -- so I guess you just never really know!
It's definitely a personal thing though, some people are cut out for it and some people are not. Especially if you compare younger kids who may be oceans apart who don't have the power to be certain about how they'll ever meet in the future, to say, two adults with stable jobs only a few states apart. Lot of things to consider, but I think it's definitely worth keeping an open mind!

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#7
Probably, but they wouldn't be as vivid.
Catch the dope with your horoscope!

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#8
From someone that hasn't been in a relationship of any kind, I think they are doomed to fail. I could be wrong but it just seems like more work for less of a reward.
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#9
(2019-04-05 20:27:43)David Wrote:
(2019-04-05 19:41:38)Ali Wrote: From someone that hasn't been in a relationship of any kind, I think they are doomed to fail. I could be wrong but it just seems like more work for less of a reward.

Do you have a similar view on relationships as a whole?

No.
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#10
(2019-04-05 20:38:50)David Wrote:
(2019-04-05 20:30:48)Ali Wrote:
(2019-04-05 20:27:43)David Wrote: Do you have a similar view on relationships as a whole?

No.

Ah, only thought you might because of things you've said in the past and that you haven't had one yet

What things have I said in the past out of curiousity?

And nah, although I think you could make a decent argument that relationships are a bad idea in general given high divorce rates (I think its something like 30%?)
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#11
Personally I think online relationships are a waste of time, but there's no reason why you can't just be friends.

Yes I friendzone people a lot.
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#12
(2019-04-06 19:28:00)David Wrote:
(2019-04-06 16:54:09)Ali Wrote:
(2019-04-05 20:38:50)David Wrote: Ah, only thought you might because of things you've said in the past and that you haven't had one yet

What things have I said in the past out of curiousity?

And nah, although I think you could make a decent argument that relationships are a bad idea in general given high divorce rates (I think its something like 30%?)

There was one thing I had in mind but after going back to check it turns out it was someone else, woops lol

Doing math on this https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/dvs/nation...-00-17.pdf it appears to be 35% although I don't think that tells the full story. Cheating statistics are also pretty high, around 50% I believe, but I don't think any of this is evidence that relationships are a bad idea. People grow apart, it's just a natural part of life, so you just gotta enjoy the time you have with each relationship and not think about it too much

Yeah, it doesn't tell the full story at all. Divorce is a pretty extreme and unpleasant measure. Divorce statistics aren't an indicator of how many unhappy marriages there are. Neither is cheating statistics. And if cheating statistics are around 50%, it indicates around at least 50% of relationships are unhappy.

I think I disagree with the latter part of your post though. These things can be used as evidence that relationships are a bad idea.

Most friendships and relationships do naturally come to an end with little pain. But a romantic relationship is different. "Growing apart" shouldn't happen in a romantic relationship - especially in marriage. The reason for this is that virtually nobody gets married without the intention of spending the rest of their lives with that person. Things like divorce and cheating destroy people. You can make the case that its not worth it if there's more than a 35% chance that this will happen to you
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#13
Thank you all for your insightful responses. I was just very curious on a third person perspective, hence why I made this thread.

As for me, I have never had an online relationship, but there have been girls I have gotten really close to and well it only became a matter of time before developed feelings for them. 

I even sang to one of them. (I like to think I have a singing voice.)
Things with that girl however didn't last. My feelings for her eventually faded away. Idk, love dies I guess?

I began spending more time with another girl and atm I'm just ''playing it cool" for the time being. Sure we spend a lot of time texting one another and playing games and calling most days, but I'm convinced I'm just a good friend to her atm and I wouldn't want to ruin that by bringing in feelings.

I very much understand how some of u describe it as a ''trap". I also agree with that, but the heart won't stop trying, will it? ^^



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#14
(2019-04-08 05:15:28)Userkid Wrote: Thank you all for your insightful responses. I was just very curious on a third person perspective, hence why I made this thread.

As for me, I have never had an online relationship, but there have been girls I have gotten really close to and well it only became a matter of time before developed feelings for them. 

I even sang to one of them. (I like to think I have a singing voice.)
Things with that girl however didn't last. My feelings for her eventually faded away. Idk, love dies I guess?

I began spending more time with another girl and atm I'm just ''playing it cool" for the time being. Sure we spend a lot of time texting one another and playing games and calling most days, but I'm convinced I'm just a good friend to her atm and I wouldn't want to ruin that by bringing in feelings.

I very much understand how some of u describe it as a ''trap". I also agree with that, but the heart won't stop trying, will it? ^^

This is unsolicited advice, but I think if you have really really genuine feelings you should tell them asap because you only grow more attached to them with time and that can prevent you from moving on. Being just-friends with someone you really like can cause you to be in a perpetual state of heartbreak. Your mental health and wellbeing  is far more important than any friendship.

[This is what happened to me and I stayed friends too long with a girl I had a massive crush on. Turns out I fell in love which was quite an interesting experience.]
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#15
A woman I know was unhappily married and filed for a divorce with her husband around last June or so. She's around my age but got married earlier than most people. After the divorce she met a guy online and they started dating, having video calls all the time, and they genuinely liked each other. Fast forward a few months and she traveled across the country to move in with him, and that's when things started falling apart quickly. The house was a mess, the boyfriends behavior was much different in person than online, one failed promise after another, and so on. Essentially he was a completely different person in real life than online. A few months later that relationship ended and she moved back in with her parents. Since then she's been working and is overall much better.

The bottom line is that you can't rely on other people to make you happy; you have to figure that out on your own.
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#16
(2019-04-09 07:43:20)Legend Wrote: A woman I know was unhappily married and filed for a divorce with her husband around last June or so. She's around my age but got married earlier than most people. After the divorce she met a guy online and they started dating, having video calls all the time, and they genuinely liked each other. Fast forward a few months and she traveled across the country to move in with him, and that's when things started falling apart quickly. The house was a mess, the boyfriends behavior was much different in person than online, one failed promise after another, and so on. Essentially he was a completely different person in real life than online. A few months later that relationship ended and she moved back in with her parents. Since then she's been working and is overall much better.

I've heard things that are scarily similar to this and it's not just loving relationships, I've heard of business deals going wrong after being set up online. Online stuff doesn't always translate perfectly with the real world. I really do feel like online relationships are the worst kind of trap you can get yourself stuck in.
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#17
(2019-04-09 10:09:36)FinalCheetah Wrote:
(2019-04-09 07:43:20)Legend Wrote: A woman I know was unhappily married and filed for a divorce with her husband around last June or so. She's around my age but got married earlier than most people. After the divorce she met a guy online and they started dating, having video calls all the time, and they genuinely liked each other. Fast forward a few months and she traveled across the country to move in with him, and that's when things started falling apart quickly. The house was a mess, the boyfriends behavior was much different in person than online, one failed promise after another, and so on. Essentially he was a completely different person in real life than online. A few months later that relationship ended and she moved back in with her parents. Since then she's been working and is overall much better.

I've heard things that are scarily similar to this and it's not just loving relationships, I've heard of business deals going wrong after being set up online. Online stuff doesn't always translate perfectly with the real world. I really do feel like online relationships are the worst kind of trap you can get yourself stuck in.

You could a similar argument for relationships where people met in real life as well.

You often don't know what a person is really like unless you actually live with them.
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#18
I would rather have a real life relationships
so I can tell if it really a girl

                                               life is a ? ¡s it

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#19
This is somewhat relevant: https://www.change.org/p/creating-fake-o...ng-a-crime

It kinda funny but I actually feel bad for them.
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#20
I wouldn't do online relationships. Anyone can easily lie and manipulate their personality over the internet and issues with trust would come up all the time in my case.
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